If i had to choose a word to describe this week, i don't think i can.
A week filled with tiredness, fatigue, mind blocks, sadness, happiness, excitement, togetherness, anger, frustration, dissapointments, tears, guilt, negativity.
Emotions running around wild and loose. Leaving no control.
The result,
CHAOS.
...But who says chaos was bad?...
Monday, Sept 15th
Came to school, my laptop could not log in. Password problem. Had to go to IT help desk. Thanks to my classmates who accompanied me. Cool day in class. Had debate. Intense is the word. But all for the sake of the lesson.
We swapped practice day with HiakDush(Amino's group).
Initial intention: Come up with a song for "Guest Welcoming" during our concert.
In the end: Ending up in the instrument store room, i shared with some of them some techniques on hand percussion. Which i wish i can share it with the whole of Beats Encore.
Break-fast: We ate @ TRCC Cafe. Yussy ate with her friends. Milly keep saying Yussy bueh! haha. We had brownie with ice-cream for dessert.
After Break-fast: IJ discussed about buying materials for our costumes. We planned to skip class the next day and go on costume hunting. They suggested i drove.
Meeting time for tomorrow: 9am, Admiralty MRT.
@Night: YUSSY gave me a shock when she said she is not going for the costume hunt and just logged off from msn without really saying why? Called and sms her, no results.
What we did: Emergency Meeting involving me, Yanie and Milly. All of us didn't know if she was kidding or she was serious at that time. Msn... Hard to tell.
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Tuesday, 16th Sept
Early in the morning: Msg Yussy again. Still no reply.
She replied at 7.57am: "Pegi lah. mane leh tk gi."
Reaction: COOL! i got conned by her... AGAIN! (in a good way)
1st set of Destinations:
1 - Pick Yussy at her block.
2 - Pick the rest up @ Admiralty MRT. (Milly, Yanie, Natt, Ninseh, Rozy Mak Joyah)
3 - Go to school, meet up with Fai, Wann and Faiz to collect money for the costumes.
@ School:
Took pictures while waiting. Relationship problem rised again. Was quite pissed. Was lucky that i had friends there. Not so bad.
2nd set of Destinations:
1 - Arab street. Bought cloth for costumes.
2 - Look for Feathers. Bought Mask for Yussy.
3 - Bras Basah. Looked for face paint.
4 - Arab Street. Zam-Zam. Bought food for break-fast. eg, Murtabak, Bryani...
5 - Dropped Ninseh off at Woodlands MRT.
6 - Dropped the rest, except Yussy at school first because they looked tired.
7 - Went back home to put the things we bought at my house. Thanks Yussy for helping me out.
8 - Went back to school for practice.
Physical and mental condition: EXHAUSTED.
Practice status: Abit No Energy.
Break-Fast: Me & Yussy shared the Nasi Bryani and Murtabak. Can see that she darn hungry and loving the bryani ayam. Great appetite for a girl.
After practice status: Hurt my finger during practice. Yussy hurt hers too and other injury reports.
On the way home: Walking along the roads of woodlands again with Yussy. She was sleep walking. I was not tired but still had this thing to go on walking.
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Wednesday, 17th Sept
Came to school. All tired and exhausted. Lack of sleep
It was science module. Problem was abit confusing. Could not see the link between the problem and the topic. I only attended half the class. Don't why, i was tired, but my body was hyper-active. Kept dancing around. Crazy.
I went for STEREOWAVE practice. We practiced songs we wanted to play this Saturday @ the Scape WeekTrip.
Ne-yo - Closer
Orson - No Tomorrow, Ain't No Party
Moloko - Sing It Back
Our very own original - Crowds are Going Insane
Quite a few of the B.E people skipped school. After STEREOWAVE practice i went to slack @ the practice room with Amino and her team. Syida and Sham also were there. I was very exhausted out of a sudden that i went into a deep sleep. The only thing i remembered was that Amino woke me up, telling me that we need to get out of the room. I went outside, and i slept again. Sham and the rest woke me up and told me that the rest are waiting downstairs. I seriously thought they were kidding because if they had came already, i would have heard the loud noises. Ok, so what the hell, i just woke up, still in a daze, went to the conference room. Yup, they were already waiting alright. My bad. I had gone into a deep sleep that i didn't know or heard anything.
Practice:
Continued to work on the finale piece. Supposedly to be completed today. I don't know why, through the minutes of that practice, frustration began to grow in me. I just had to control it. Slowly, when things weren't going the way it should, i just had to let it out. I can't control the frustration no more.
To the Beats Encore people:
I'm really sorry for yelling at you people the other time. I really felt frustrated that for weeks and weeks we've been doing almost the same thing yet everyone still felt unsure. Eventhough there were changes, but the beats still remained the same. I apologise sincerely for that. Hope you all understand and i seek forgiveness from all of you. Lets try to work harder and make the practices more enjoyable.
-SyaZ-
After practice:
Yanie, Yussy, Milly, Nini, Rosy, Haikal, Nana, myself... did i left anyone out?
They wanted to play bunga api. Cool or what? It was cool. At that point of time, i really don't know why but i was so down. My body was not tired but my mind was. I really wish i could join you all in the moment of fun. All i could do was to put myself to sleep even for a few minutes.
On the way home:
Tonight, we took the bus!
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Thursday, 18th Sept
I would sum up this day to a minimal.
Basically i had a great day today. This is perhaps the day i needed. A day away from the loud sounds. I do love those loud sounds, but sometimes there comes a day when you just want to have a sense of peace in the mind.
Class was fun. We played card games, and all i was looking forward to was to go for break-fast with the guys and girls in my class.
Syuk, Zee, Wanie, Hafiz, Caliph and Daryl.
We went to Al-Ameen @ Woodlands for break-fast.
After that:
We hang out, chilled out and took pictures!
Check it out:
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Friday, 19th Sept
I just want to talk about what happened during rehearsals.
I was happy @ first. I felt that IJ was prepared for this rehearsal. We practiced hard for it. This time around, all the teams improved.
La'Dunges - Better song structure
Kenji Dot - Your song structure was fantastic. First time looking at you all performing as the whole group.
HiakDush - Better than the last rehearsals
but the part that made me really cry inside was when it was my group's turn
IbanJiwarr - Where was the togetherness? The music? The moves? Where? What happened? Why?
After our turn, i was left in silence. I could not speak. The thing that made it even worse, why did the whole group dissapear after that? Yes, you all wanted to collect your food that you ordered, but why must it be the whole group?
During break-fast:
I know you all kept asking if i am ok or am i angry. I just could not find myself to speak. I was totally in a mess. My mind totally went off and i totally went down. After i got my 1st bite of my food, i remembered about Fadilla. I don't know why. I went to look for her at the cafe. She was not feeling well. I wanted to know if she had already buka or not. I called her, ok, the 2nd time i called her then she answered. She was buying something at 7-11. Cool.
Fadilla, must take care ok!
After break-fast:
Evaluation of groups.
Actually, i think IJ knows what went on after this. I really don't feel like typing this down because it really was not a good thing to remember. But we have to learn from our mistakes.
I'll end today's summary here...
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Saturday, 20th Sept
STEREOWAVE @ Scape, Youth Park
Weekend Trip
The sound set-up was fantastic. Eventhough it was tiring to play, i didn't feel like stopping.
But where was the crowd?
I wish you all were there!
After that:
I miss my secondary school friends. I went to meet them to break-fast and we chilled at orchard after that. It was fun.
Orange Julius Strawberry Cheesecake Blizzard!
We haven't had this kind of chilling session in a while.
Farhan, Ben, Imran & Shirin, Tauhid & Girlfriend.
LOVE YOU ALL LOTS!
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